I hope he knows that I'm trying and I hope he knows that I am happy. If anything, he's the only thing that feels right in my life right now and our relationship is what gives me hope and makes everything else seem worth while. He brings a smile to my face and even though at times, I come off negative or may say negative things I am not doing so in an attempt to sabotage our relationship - that would be awfully stupid on my part.
There is no doubt in my mind that he loves me and cares about me and wants to be with me and I know there is no doubt in his mind that I feel the same for him. I know at times I seem sad or unhappy but deep down I am happy, very happy and the happiest I have been in a long time. I am trying my hardest to do what is next in line which is finding a job and saving up money so that I can move on with my life, so that WE can move on to the next step in our relationship and move on with life
together
; I am trying and I'm trying to keep my head up even when it may be/seem/feel hard at times. I do it because it's what feels right and I do it because I know he's who I want to be with and I do it because he has my heart.
It's hard to be away from him, from the person that you feel loves you the most and cares about you the most - the person who wants to give you the world. Leaving him was the hardest thing I had to do in a long time and while it seems that I haven't been happy since I've been home, I am happy - a little sad because I don't want to be away from him but I'm happy because I have him. Like I said, I'm trying...very hard and I'm sorry if I let you down or make you think otherwise when I cry or I seem upset or get irritated. Like you, I just want things to go smoothly and to turn out okay and I'm not really worried about it because I know everything will turn out fine. Our relationship is the one thing I am positively certain of, just know that I'm just trying to figure the next step out and I appreciate you being there for me, more than you could ever know. Just know that I love you with all my heart and that I can't wait to be with you.
My second test for my Marriage and Family class was a take home test that had to be double spaced, typed up and at least 5-10 pages in length...not a big deal, I went over the 10 pages required for the test but when I went to print the stupid thing out I realized I was out of ink. Not only is ink REALLY expensive - I think I spent about $40 on a tri-color cartridge and black cartridge combo pack - but I always tend to forget what ink cartridges I need to get (the actual number on the cartridge) or even what kind of printer I have to look up what I need. Luckily, there are sites out there like Cartridge Finder that allows you to look up over 10,000 different models of printers, copiers, and fax machines so you know exactly what ink cartridge to get every time. This comes in handy for me since we have an older Lexmark printer and can't always find the cartridges needed in the stores - with this website, it gives a list of cartridges we can use with said printer and also checks PriceGrabber's merchant listings to find the best price on the product needed. Maybe next time I'll be able to find a better deal when it comes to ink!
I'm not exactly sure what I will be up this weekend, it's been raining here since Tuesday so it's been really nasty outside and pretty chilly. The fair started last night but the fair is never exciting, quite honestly it's pretty lame but if it clears up I may or may not go with my cousin since she asked me a few weeks back if I'd want to go. I plan on going either tomorrow or Sunday up to the outlet mall and picking up some applications at various stores - I need to find a job and start saving up some money so that I can move to Michigan in the next few months...or whenever the time is right. I have a lot to think about and figure out and I'm trying to not let it stress me out but eh, I always end up stressed :( Anyways, I'm bored...I need a new game for my Wii since I finished Paper Mario a few weeks ago :P
If you haven't noticed, I'm back from Michigan and the most amazing weekend I've ever had with the most amazing man in the world! :) Obviously, you can tell just from that that I had a great time - which I did and I wouldn't change any of it for the world...except for the trip to have been longer. My flight from Charleston to Detroit went smoothly and I actually arrived ahead of schedule, was about 2:15ish rather than 2:30. I arrived at the hotel at exactly 3pm and was able to relax a little before I changed my clothes and got ready for Alan to come to the hotel. He had to work that Friday so he wasn't able to pick me up at the airport but that's okay...he got to the hotel around 5:30pm because he was silly and went to the wrong hotel, haha! The initial moments were us being nervous and not really knowing what to say since we were both taken aback by the fact that both of us were finally together but it soon passed and things went smoothly the rest of the weekend.
He surprised me with a box of Godiva Milk Chocolates and a card for Sweetest Day. We went out to eat the first night at Champps which has delicious food. Saturday, we went over to the mall and checked out a few stores - I got to go into an Apple store :P We also got 2 chocolate covered Strawberries at Godiva and he wouldn't let me look at the jewelry because he knew I'd go straight for the wedding bands- there was a sign at one of the stores and I started to smile, he's like what are you smiling at and I turned him around and he saw what it was...he was like "don't even, missy" :P That night he treated me to an amazing dinner at Bennihanna's Japanese Steak house, where he had lobster and fillet mignon and I had steak and shrimp along with fried rice and soup - we both dressed in purple, it was cute :D After dinner, we went to a late movie and watched We Own the Night and headed back to the hotel for lovely us time ;) On Sunday, we met his mom at a local cafe that Alan always goes too for breakfast - his mom is so cute and such a trip...she talks a mile a minute though, haha. We ended up going back to the hotel after that and slept most of the afternoon since we had been out until 2 or so the night before but when we got up we just drove around town and went to a few stores.
The town he lives in (Plymouth, MI) is the cutest little town with the cute little houses. In my opinion, it's just a great all-American type town; it's not really uppity or rich looking but it's not all old and run down either, it has it's own unique flare to it and it looks like the city takes good care of it's property and parks. The trees were absolutely gorgeous with leaves that were yellow, red and brown and the weather...perfect! I can definitely see myself living there and raising a family which is very important to me and to him, so that's a good thing :)
He had to work yesterday so after I dropped him off at work, I went back to the hotel and slept until 10am; I woke up and finished packing and checked out around 11:30am. I drove downtown and ate lunch at Panera Bread and just sat around until 4 for Alan to meet me. It was a nice day but one of those days were I had to fight back tears every minute because I knew I would be leaving that night. We ate dinner at Applebee's and headed to the airport around 6:30pm...we sat in the airport for about an hour and a half before I went through the security checkpoint at which point he could no longer be with me as they only allow people with boarding passes past those points these days. It was the hardest thing I had to do; he cried, I cried...we cried together. I didn't want to leave and he didn't want me to go. For the first time, I have someone in my life that loves me for the person I am and expects me to be nobody different. I was scared when I went to Michigan only because I didn't know what would happen - I didn't know if things would change when I got back to Charleston or if he'd like the person he had gotten to know the last 3 months and to be able to say that nothing has changed between us is amazing...the only thing that has changed is that we are closer than before and we're stronger as a couple. He means the world to me, the absolute world to me and I would do anything for him. He is such an amazing person with a great personality, not to mention he looks hot in his purple dress shirt ;) He's coming down here in December and even though that is 2 months away we'll make it and we'll be okay. I know now where I am suppose to be and who I want to be with and the answer is in Plymouth with Alan.
The only picture I have from this weekend aside from a few I took of me at the hotel prior to him meeting me there. The weekend was filled with amazing memories and good times that will not be forgotten - I was too busy spending time with the person I love to worry about the camera :heart:
Yesterday was SUCH a long day...I didn't fall asleep until 4am or so and had to get up for a class that started at 11:30am. I got home around 1pm or so and crashed for a few hours until the lawn mower people started mowing away outside the damn apartment - that woke me up :(Â Then Alan called around 3:30-4pm like he always does when he gets off work; he's way to cute, acting all giddy and stuff because he's excited :D Anyways...it wasn't until later in the evening that I was able to get all my clothes washed and dried and folded and put away in the suitcase - I still have to put some stuff in but I'll do that in the morning. I'm getting up around 9-9:30am so I can take a shower and make sure I have everything I need, my flight leaves at 12:15pm but boarding starts at 11:50am and you know they always tell you to be there an hour or two early. I'll be in Michigan until Monday night which I arrive home at 11:35pm...so until then! :heart:
I’m very frugal when it comes to my money and when it comes down to actually spending money, I love when an opportunity to save money presents itself. That's why I always look for the best deals and for sites that offer me the chance to save money - one of those sites is called UltimateCoupons.com who offers a wide variety of coupons for major retail stores and gives you the chance to save some extra cash! Not only that but over at their blog Everybody Loves Coupons, they are having an amazing contest where you can Win a Nintendo Wii but you only have until October 31st, 2007 to enter so you best hurry for your chance at this great prize!
It only took from the time I turned 21 until NOW to get it done - damn dad for being lazy and NOT listening when I asked him about it months & months ago :rolleyes:. When you're in the military or part of a military family, everyone gets benefits - insurance, access to things on the base like the exchange, commissary, etc - which are accessed with valid military ID cards, however when one turns 21 you're knocked out of the system. The only way to keep your benefits when you're 21 is if you're in school or you can't take care of yourself (IE: disabled); you get to keep your benefits until you graduated from college or when you turn 23 which ever comes first. My dad retired FOR GOOD in September from the Kansas Army National Guard (he was in the Marines for 18 years though...but that's a different story) so it wasn't until last month when he was doing all his retirement paperwork that he got around to getting me back in the DEERS system which is where all the information for dependants and such is store.
Even though my ID expires on Dec. 29th, 2007 (I graduate from the community college in Dec.), when I transfer I just have to get a new enrollment verification and they can update my information. I'm just really glad I finally have my insurance back because that $60/month for a BC prescription that I NEED was killing my mom's wallet, haha, and paying a $9 copay is so much nicer than $60 out of my pocket or hers. But of course, my dad is stubborn and doesn't listen - hell, we even told him that we needed an actual copy of the form he had to fill out for DEERS which lists all his information and has his signature on it and he wouldn't fax it to us, he insisted that all I had to do was go to the ID office show them my ID and they could pull up in the computer - WRONG. The lady told me that because my sponsor (my dad) wasn't with me in person (he lives in Kansas) that I had to have the actual form with his signature so she gave me the fax number while I was at the office and I had to call my dad and get him to fax the form to her, it was a big I TOLD YOU SO...haha!
The closest base to where I live in the Charleston Air Force Base (the Marine Corps base is in Beaufort which is 2 hours from here) and I hardly EVER go up there, so I had to get my mom to drive me up there because I wasn't exactly sure how to get there since I never go there. They wouldn't even let her on the base with me....because my old ID was expired; I was like great, I'm going to get lost because I never come to this base and then I'm going to get to the ID office and not be able to get my ID because I have absolutely no idea what to do. I found the office okay and signed myself in via the computer with no problems, I got my ID with no problems after they received the faxed form from my dad and I was good to go :) Yay!
In a weeks time, I will be in the arms of the man I love the most...and the one person I can honestly say loves me the most. I can't wait. :heart:
I swear one of these days I'm going to turn into a chicken - I eat so damn much of it, it's kind of ridiciously. Alan gives me a hard time about it :P He said he's taking me to a steak dinner when I'm in Michigan next week because I eat so much chicken. I can't help it, I love chicken...just today for lunch I had chicken fingers from Zaxby's, mmm!! :yum: Classes were cancelled today due to a blown transformer so we had no power/AC in the building, it's been a good day so far. I also get my insurance back (YAY!) as soon as I get the form from my dad, woot. I'm off to play some Super Paper Mario!
- I had my second probability and statistics test today; I know I didn't make a 100 on it like I did my first one (even though I wasn't expecting a 100 on the first one!) which is a bummer but I know I passed it, which is always a good thing.
- My marriage and family test will be posted some time tomorrow online - she is giving us a take home test and I have a feeling it's going to be a bunch of essay questions, but no big deal, I rather it be take home where I can spend time THINKING about my answers thoroughly than rush and mess up...I hate that.
- I get my second Astronomy test back tomorrow and I'm dreading the grade. I'm absolutely pissed off the teacher as is the majority of the class, he can't teach worth a crap and a lot of us are fearful of failing the class for the semester - if I fail it because of his teaching, I'm going to be pissed. It's like...don't give us 100 vocab words then not put any of the definitions on the test, if you're going to give us all questions about specific information out of the chapters then tell us exactly what we should be looking for - it's kind of hard to memorize and remember a lot of key details in four chapthers when you don't teach it to us in class and you don't tell us what we should be looking for!
- According to my countdown in the sidebar, I have 15 days OR two weeks (from tomorrow) until I see Alan. I am so excited - I was lying in bed earlier while waiting to leave for my haircut appointment, rolled over and said out loud "I'm so excited, I get to see my baby in two weeks!" It's just a surreal feeling to know that everything is planned and in place from the tickets to the hotel to him getting the car for the weekend, places of where he wants to take me and things I want to do - :heart: :heart:
- I got my haircut today! It feels so soft and light and looks really good. It's not really any different than how I had it cut before, long layers with some shorter layers in the front to give me some bangs (but they aren't short!). I've had layers in my hair for awhile now but I hadn't gotten an actual CUT for awhile so everything was all messy and ugly looking - I only trust my salon lady to actually cut my hair at $45 a pop, but I'll go to a cheap place to get it trimmed :P Maybe I'll take some pictures tomorrow...!
- I hope these damn, ugly, sore to the touch bumps on my chin go away soon :( They aren't like pimples because they aren't raised and they aren't zits because they aren't white/black...they are just under the skin sore spots: DAMN YOU PERIOD starting this coming week, that's why my face is all ew...go away please before I go to Michigan! lol
